"Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light." - Brené Brown
Two weeks ago I was in Mexico for a family reunion. It was supposed to be my grandfather’s 90th birthday celebration, but unfortunately he transitioned two weeks before his party. I was nervous to go on this trip. First of all, I was going to be faced with the death of my Abuelito, whom I love so much. Secondly, the last time I was in Mexico was 6 years ago to introduce my family to my husband. This time I was going back as a single woman. My family is Catholic and lives in a very small, conservative town. The future is not female in Mexico, (at least not anytime soon) and boy was I reminded of that as soon as I arrived. Every family member I saw felt the need to share their opinion regarding my separation. Mainly that it was a bad decision and some even went as far as to tell me I would never find another man as good as my former husband. The shaming and guilt was palpable.
As I continue to grow and release old belief systems, I have encountered a lot of resistance and judgment from others. I know they are projecting their own fears and insecurities. And I also know it’s an expression of their love and concerned for my well being. I remained compassionate and just let them speak their mind. And I let them know that it was a very difficult decision and that I’m striving for inner peace and joy. But what I learned is that they were mirroring the feelings I have been carrying with me for the last year. I feel so much guilt for causing pain to someone I love. I feel shame that I am a mid-thirty year old woman not in the place I envisioned myself to be. I am scared that I don’t know what my future looks like. And yes, I am fearful that I might end up alone.
We all struggle with shame and fear of not being enough. We are afraid of disappointing our family, our friends, our partner, and an old idea of who we thought we should be. Breathwork has been a lifesaver for me. It’s the easiest and most effective way I have been able to get in touch with my emotions, let them expand, find the root cause of why I’m feeling the way I’m feeling, and then let them go. This is why I love this work so much and love guiding you in your journey. This month I'm bringing back my evening class held in my home. It's an intimate class where we go a little deeper. Make sure to RSVP ahead of time as space is limited. I'm also back in Manhattan Beach this Sunday and Topanga Canyon in a couple of weeks. Thank you for all your support and love. I’m looking forward to continue breathing and expanding with you.
This picture taken after a major meltdown at the cemetery. Where I asked my grandpa and guides for help. I grounded. I breathed. And I connected with my inner strength and peace.
Private Breathwork Sessions
"What can I say? Ana is amazingly gifted! It was my first time experiencing breathwork and it won't be my last. I went in not knowing what to expect, but Ana was so welcoming with a big smile and her calm nature. The whole experience was emotional yet healing and empowering. I literally breathed, released and relaxed."
Private breathwork sessions are an hour long; where we dive a little deeper, you also get a reiki healing, and you leave feeling relaxed and with clarity. Book your session here.
Favorite Songs in August
1) Free Me - Sia
2) Take a Chance (feat. Little Dragon) - Flume
3) SoulBird Rise - India.Arie
4) Inspired - Miley Cyrus
5) This Little Light of Mine - Ladysmith Black Mambazo
Favorite Playlists: Topanga, Hyperslow