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EP 26: Beyond Mistakes: Finding Healing through Self-Forgiveness

EP 26: Beyond Mistakes: Finding Healing through Self-Forgiveness

Let’s dive into a topic that has been resonating in my Dream Bigger Mastermind lately – self-forgiveness.

We, especially us women, have a tendency to be incredibly hard on ourselves. It's like we set these impossibly high standards and beat ourselves up when we don't meet them. 

I've noticed with my Dream Bigger Mastermind clients that this struggle with self-forgiveness can keep us stuck, preventing us from pursuing our dreams and goals. So, let's unpack this together, and I'll share my personal approach to self-forgiveness.

My Journey to Self-Forgiveness

Back in my early 20s, I found myself trapped in an unhealthy and abusive relationship. Shame and self-blame became my constant companions. I questioned my intelligence, wondering why I couldn't break free.

Opening up about my situation led to judgment and blame, reinforcing my sense of guilt. The shame became a heavy burden, and discussing it felt unsafe. Eventually, I broke free from that toxic relationship, but the emotional residue lingered.

It took a pivotal moment – watching a scene in HBO's Big Little Lies – for me to finally show compassion to my younger self. That's when the floodgates of self-forgiveness opened. I realized I had been unfairly harsh on my 18-year-old self, who was navigating the complexities of a traumatic relationship.

Unveiling Layers of Self-Forgiveness

Self-forgiveness, I've learned, is a process with layers. It's about connecting with your younger self, understanding the circumstances, and acknowledging that, at that time, you did the best you could. The realization that your present self isn't the same person who made those choices is a game-changer.

In my Dream Bigger mastermind, I guide my clients through exercises and healing experiences to connect with their younger selves. We unravel stories, release guilt and shame, and foster compassion and self-love. The transformation is palpable as they start showing up differently in their lives.

Shifting Perspectives on Past Choices

Another powerful aspect of self-forgiveness is shifting perspectives on past choices. Take financial struggles, for example. Many clients carry the weight of past financial mistakes, repeating the mantra, "I'm not good with money."

I invite them to connect with their younger selves, understanding the context of their actions. Maybe they mirrored behaviors they witnessed in their childhood. This shift in perspective allows them to see the strengths and resilience they displayed during challenging times.

The Positive Ripple Effect

Now, let's talk about the positive ripple effect of self-forgiveness. By releasing the chains of the past, you liberate yourself from the burdens that hold you back. You step into the present with newfound energy, concentration, and happiness.

Research supports the idea that regular self-forgiveness contributes to increased happiness and overall well-being. It's not about dismissing intentional harm; it's about acknowledging mistakes, seeking forgiveness, and taking responsibility.

Embracing the Journey of Growth

Self-forgiveness isn't a one-time event; it's a continuous journey. It empowers you to make better choices, set healthy boundaries, and strengthen relationships. The fear that self-compassion hinders success is debunked as you find a balance between accountability and kindness to yourself.

So, here's my invitation to you: reflect on what you're still holding onto, what's keeping you stuck, and extend compassion to your past self. Talk to that younger you with the same kindness you'd offer your best friend. Understand how self-criticism may be hindering your growth.

The Liberation of Self-Forgiveness

Self-forgiveness is a liberating experience. It allows you to leave the past in the past, focus on the present, and trust in your ability to make better choices. The energy shift is real – you become softer, anxiety diminishes, and the loop of self-criticism quiets down.

So, if you've been carrying the weight of past mistakes, take a moment to forgive yourself. It's not about erasing the past but acknowledging it, learning from it, and moving forward with self-love.

Building Confidence and Trust

As you embark on this journey of self-forgiveness, notice the positive changes in your confidence and self-trust. It paves the way for aligned action, making choices rooted in growth and empowerment.

Remember, you are not defined by your past. The person you are today has evolved, learned, and grown. Embrace the journey, forgive yourself, and trust that you'll continue to do better.

Join Me on the Dream Bigger Journey

If you resonate with this topic and need support in your self-forgiveness journey, consider joining the next round of the Dream Bigger Mastermind. We're kicking off towards the end of February, and I've infused new elements to enhance your experience.

In the Dream Bigger Mastermind, we're not just about manifesting goals; we're about building a strong foundation of self-belief and confidence. It's a space for healing, growth, and realizing your dreams with ease.

Get on the waitlist to be the first to know when doors open for enrollment. I can't wait to connect with you and support you on your journey to self-forgiveness and beyond.


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