EP 62: Busy, Busy, Busy: Are You Avoiding What Really Matters?
In this post, I want to talk about something that many of us struggle with—avoidance. It’s a sneaky little habit that shows up in ways we don’t always recognize, but it can have a huge impact on our lives and our ability to achieve our dreams.
Avoidance can take on many forms. Sometimes, it looks like keeping yourself busy with tasks that aren’t really moving you towards your goals—doing all the little things that need to be done but aren’t truly important. Other times, it manifests as procrastination, where you keep putting off the things you know you need to do because the thought of actually doing them brings up fear, anxiety, or discomfort.
But here’s the thing—avoidance is a coping mechanism. It’s a way our brain tries to protect us from what it perceives as danger, whether that’s the fear of failure, the discomfort of a difficult conversation, or the anxiety of stepping into the unknown. Unfortunately, while avoidance may provide temporary relief, it doesn’t solve the underlying issue. Instead, it prolongs the stress, anxiety, and feelings of being stuck.
How Avoidance Holds Us Back
I recently worked with a client in my Dream Bigger Mastermind who was struggling with this very issue. She was avoiding showing up on social media, missing our live sessions, and generally not taking the actions she needed to move towards her goals. When we dug deeper, we found that her avoidance was rooted in fear—fear of judgment, fear of failure, and fear of not being good enough.
Sound familiar? Whether it’s in your career, relationships, or personal growth, avoidance can sneak in and derail your progress. Maybe you’re working insane hours at your job, convincing yourself that you’re just being a good employee, but in reality, you’re avoiding spending time on your own passions and dreams. Or perhaps you’re putting off that important conversation with a loved one because you’re afraid of the confrontation.
But here’s the truth: avoiding these things doesn’t make them go away. In fact, it often makes things worse. The stress builds up, the anxiety lingers, and you find yourself feeling more and more stuck.
Breaking the Cycle of Avoidance
So how do we break free from this cycle of avoidance? The first step is awareness. Take a moment to reflect on your life—where are you avoiding taking action? What are you putting off, and why? What fears or worries are holding you back?
Once you’ve identified where avoidance is showing up, it’s time to challenge those fears. Ask yourself, “Is this worst-case scenario really likely to happen? Is there any evidence that things will go as badly as I fear?” Often, you’ll find that your fears are exaggerated or unfounded.
Next, break down the task or goal that you’ve been avoiding into smaller, manageable steps. Write it down, and then start taking action, one small step at a time. As you do this, you’ll start to build momentum, and that overwhelming task will start to feel less daunting.
It’s also important to be kind and compassionate with yourself throughout this process. Remember, avoidance is your brain’s way of trying to protect you. Acknowledge that, and then gently remind yourself that you’re capable of handling whatever comes your way.
Taking Ownership of Your Life
At the end of the day, breaking free from avoidance is about taking ownership of your life. It’s about recognizing that you have the power to change your reality, to show up for yourself, and to take the actions necessary to create the life you desire.
One of my clients, who also struggled with avoidance, had a breakthrough when she stopped waiting for her business partner to change and instead focused on showing up differently herself. She took responsibility for her own emotions, communicated clearly, and the entire dynamic of their relationship shifted. She felt empowered, and her business started to thrive.
How I Can Help You Overcome Avoidance
If this resonates with you and you’re ready to start overcoming avoidance in your life, I invite you to join my Dream Bigger Mastermind. This is a space where I’ll help you uncover the root causes of your avoidance and give you the tools and support you need to heal it. Together, we’ll work on shifting your energy, breaking old patterns, and taking consistent, empowered action towards your dreams.
Enrollment for the next cohort of Dream Bigger Mastermind starts soon, and I’m also hosting a free manifestation workshop, “Step Into Your Dreams,” on Thursday, September 5th. We’ll do some powerful manifestation rituals, and I’ll share more about how the Dream Bigger Mastermind can serve as your roadmap to manifesting your desires. Click here to register for the workshop.
Thank you so much for reading. I’d love to hear from you—has avoidance been holding you back? If so, what are you going to do to start breaking free from it? Please feel free to reach out, send me a DM, or share this post with someone who might need to hear it. Let’s support each other in taking control of our lives and manifesting our dreams.
Sending you so much love and strength. Let’s keep breathing and moving forward together.
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